Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Obama Nominates Locke for Commerce Post (Here's Why It Should Have Been *John* Locke)

The news reports are buzzing across the wires today: "Obama nominates Locke for commerce secretary." Now, the assumption is being made that he's talking about Gary Locke, the former governor of Washington State, but if Obama really wants to think outside the box, I have a modest proposal to make: Obama should choose the other Locke: JOHN Locke from "Lost."

Sure, John Locke has never held elective office, but you can't say he doesn't have political experience. (And don't tell him what he can't do, or else you might get a knife in the back!) Let's look at his substantial achievements over the last four-plus seasons. In this time he has:

* gone face-to-face with the Smoke Monster... and lived to tell about it!
* fixed the time-warping Frozen Donkey Wheel!
* effectively interfaced with people (and other entities) of all backgrounds, from department store customers to Losties, Tailies, the Others, and the Other Others
* earned the trust of his higher-ups including Ben, Jacob, Richard Alpert, and Christian Shephard
* has pulled himself up by his bootstraps (literally), going from a physically challenged wheelchair-bound sad sack to a hard-charging leader of the Others
* served effectively as a clerk in a major cardboard-box manufacturer
* shown loyalty and sacrifice by giving one of his kidneys to his lying, scheming, fat-cat, bird-hunting, threw-his-son-out-a-window father

And, of course, John Locke is, like Pres. Obama, a self-professed "man of faith."

If the president is looking for unique qualifications and wants to really "reach across the aisle (isle)," he'll choose John Locke as commerce secretary.

No comments: